Talent Search

Canada Anne on Last Comic Standing 2010 NBC! Gone viral oh yeah!

2010-06-20T14:34:00.000-07:00

These past weeks have been horrible trying to find a new job as my call center job expired recently. The thing is that while you are working in the “Auschwitz” environment, you scream, kick and bleed to get out of there. Once you are out, you are even more lost then when you were trapped in that soul sucking environment.

I hated this job so much that during the Last Comic Standing interviews when asked the question “What would you do if you won Last Comic Standing?” Without hesitation I replied “Get me on Last Comic Standing so I don’t have to be a telemarketer anymore!” This is now featured on the NBC website for Last Comic Standing.

Here is the link:

http://www.nbc.com/last-comic-standing/video/next-on-last-comic-standing/1234092/?__source=last-comic-standing%7Chome%7Cfeatured%7Crecent

The sad part about this is that I really meant it and when I was in front of the judges, I pleaded with them to take me and I even told them that they “Beat You” at the place I worked. They thought I was joking but I really wasn’t.

So today I am at home desperately looking for another job and feeling depressed yet at the same time I feel some sort of hope that I am featured in the promo venting about the crappy job I hated so much. Such irony.

Such a Catch 22.

Wish this would somehow help me find another job….

Anything right now would suffice.

CA ;)

LCS Season 7 is the worst ever!

2010-06-08T07:23:00.000-07:00

So summer season on network TV has begun and so has the plethora of garbage reality shows. The Japanese show Wipeout the Japanese extreme obstacle course where contestants endure humiliation and pain for a cash prize. Then we have Last Comic Season, season 7. This has got to be by far the worst production NBC has ever aired. They should have taken note and stopped producing this pile of cow manure at season 2. Why they continue this disaster is because they are filling up space and can’t come up with any decent material.

The worst part about this season 7 of this mess are the judges. First of all who the hell is Natasha Leggero?? Where did this anorexic pixie crawl under whose crotch to surface on this earth to make it on network TV and give her the right to judge comics?? I don’t get it. I can kind of get Greg Giraldo, even Andy Kindler. But where did they scrape that twig from what road kill did this rise from??

I went to that useless audition for LCS back in March of this year at Gotham. I knew it was a farce from the start but what I didn’t know was how much of a phony Natasha Leggero really is. I will never forget when I passed the first round to get to the judges. I went down to the bathroom of Gotham and she happened to be there. I just “hi and nice dress”. She replied “Thanks” and that was it, or so I thought.

The moment I went up on that stage, she used that against me! Not kidding. The face that I went to the bathroom is a crime?? Maybe I should of offered a response and said something like “well Natasha it was great seeing you in the bathroom too, throwing your guts out!”

Truly I didn’t expect to land a comedy career or for anything to happen from this farce of a show. Though if you are going to have judges then, have a real judge not just a trace of a body to barely keep the seat warm.

The worst part about this show is that they already have their pre-picked people and the people who are legitimate comics don’t have any chance at all even if they are really good. It’s all fixed; it’s all a sham. ..and it really is a shame.

A.

2009-05-03T13:01:00.001-07:00

This was the original posting for this casting call:

Sid Paterson Advertising is casting for non-union on camera talents for buyout. We are casting for “Real People” roles, both male and female, between the ages of 25 – 50, plus one child. Looking for both English speaking and bilingual Spanish and English speaking, as well as dialect talent in British, Canadian, Indian, Mexican, Argentinean and Peruvian. Also non-speaking roles. Must be welcoming and personal.

So you would think that this would be a perfect role for me. I went to this casting call over on Madison avenue. I went up to the 6th floor and signed in and then sat in the waiting area, and waited and waited some more. I went in there wearing my Canadian emblem with a maple leaf hat and Canadian "Moose" shirt. There was NO way anyone could compete with me on this one. Had this in the bag....or so I thought.
There were several different types in the waiting room.

You had the model "Untouchable" types, the "way too pretty" types, the "delicate flower" types, and a couple of Indians, and Hispanics. Most of them were auditioning for the "Middle America" role.

For the role I was auditioning for doing the "British-Canadian" part, there was NO ONE else in that room for the role I went for. Being this fact, and knowing that I didn't have to compete with the "fresh young nubiles", gave me the confidence that I needed to get this role.

So finally after 3 hours, my name is called "Anne Canada". I storm into the audition room with my Canadian emblems and say "Guess where I'm from? Eh!" So I immediately went in front of the camera, slated my name and then proceeded with the audition.

The line was "We'd call our daughter in the States. She just moved to New York City." I did it first in Canadian, which is my regular voice and then in British.
They loved it!! They asked me to do the line in British again an I was on a role. The director even told me that I have "Betty Davis eyes".

I mean what a huge compliment. Then I was joking with the director about Canada. "How many Canadians does it take to screw in a light bulb?" Then he asks me "Is the population in Canada still 500,000?" I respond, "No actually it's only 499,00 after Celine Dion left us!"

I left the room with a great feeling and on top of it I had the entire room laughing and I knew they were interested me. Even the receptionist was asking me where I perform and all. I knew I nailed this part. I left that place happy and my head held up high!

A couple of days later I get this e-mail from them:
Hey Anne This is Dara from the Sid Paterson Casting for IDTI was wondering if it would be possible to get a recording of you saying this line with a Canadian accent and a British accent?"We'd call our daughter in the States. She just moved to New York City." Let me know!

Awesome I thought, this means I got the part!!!! I responded to her Yes I am available to do this role and for her to send me details. So Monday goes by, nothing. Tuesday goes by and still no word, nothing. On Wednesday I call up that office and ask to speak to her and I get put through the voice messaging system.

I leave a message and basically say that I would like to speak with her and I am a little confused to what she is asking, and if she could get back to me to clarify. Very professional and to the point. Thursday goes by and still no word. I figure I will give it until Friday before I try calling again.

I went out and did my regular job, get home to check my e-mails and LO and Behold there is an e-mail from her. I was getting excited and before I opened it I was thinking "well I guess she took so long in getting back to me because she has been busy.

Here is the e-mail she sends me:
Hey Anne!Sorry I haven’t been able to get back to you.By the time I had a moment to schedule something with you to hear more accents, the client decided on someone else and it was off to 2 days of shooting! Thank you though for getting back to me. Hope all is well!

CAN YOU F'IN BELIEVE THIS?????? I e-mail her back because I was really angry and upset. First off all for having me wait around so long and to make me believe that I had the role. On top of it HOW MANY CANADIANS WHO CAN DO A BRITISH ACCENT IN NEW YORK ARE THERE?????

I mean this is such a HUGE slap in the face. I really don't think I will get over this one. I mean if I can't even get a role as a Canadian, being an authentic Canadian..then what in the world is the "right role" for me???

Unbelievable. I am SO upset over this right now I can't even breathe. I give up. This has really done it.

Sigh :(

Accuvein Audition

2009-04-20T16:02:00.000-07:00

I went to this audition for this new pharmaceutical device named “Accuvein”. Yes as you can determine in the name, the device checks for “good veins” to tap into in order to draw blood from.

Like any other audition, you go there and don’t expect much of anything. Just go in and give it all you got. So I went to this casting place over in the Flatiron district. There were already 100 people signed up on the list.

In the room there were heavy set people, thin people, and most of all babies. Big babies, small babies, chubby babies, ugly babies, cute babies. All these babies were in carriages and strollers wailing away as their Mothers were trying to shut them up and comfort them for their audition.

When I got to the audition I was check in #99 and I thought I would have to wait forever. To my surprise it went very quickly..only 2 hours of waiting!

You watch every person; baby and Mother go into the room and see their reaction when they come out. Most of the babies went in crying and within seconds were out the door wailing stronger than ever.

Finally after sitting there for 4 hours through all this madness going on the guy calls out check in #99. I looked at my card..”Hey that’s me!” At first when I entered the room I was nervous as with any audition, though by the time I was called, I really just wanted to get this audition done and over with.

I thought it to be strange that after all that time in the waiting room, there were NO sides or lines handed out to study before going into this audition.. So I figure, great it’s going to be one of these “improv auditions”.

I get into the room; the guy takes my information and tells me to take a seat. There is one camera set up and a blue screen backdrop. I slate my name to the camera and I am expecting to get a scenario by the director to work off of and just improv this product to try and sell it.

Instead, the director says: “Roll up your sleeves as far as you can and Put out your arms so we can see your veins”. I was like what??? So I did as directed, rolled up my sleeves as far as they would go and thrust my arms out towards the camera to display the best veins I have.

The Woman in the room then comes by with a red light device and streams it up and down my arms to “highlight” the best veins. Then the hard part came, I was asked to show the back of my arms. Same thing again this time with the red light up and down the arms to the hands. After 5 seconds that was it! Thank-you and get out! Next!

So much for getting that part. I didn’t have the right veins! Can you believe this? I would have had better luck being a heroin addict to have the best veins to tap into.

Maybe this product is being marketed to druggies! Who knows? What I do know is that I faltered at another audition, wasted an entire day to do this and don’t get the part b/c my veins are not good enough.

Go figure.
CA.

Feature Film THE LAST AIRBENDER CASTING CALL in Flushing Queens!!!

2009-03-01T14:45:00.000-08:00

The entire Month of February has been a complete write-off in terms of background work. Actually...it's been a VERY bad month for getting other job/income as well. What a huge struggle. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

So when you see Craig's List postings such as:

**BE IN A MOVIE!!** a MAJOR MOTION PICTURE filming in Philadelphia “THE LAST AIRBENDER” Based on the hugely successful Nickelodeon animated TV series, “Avatar”, the PARAMOUNT PICTURES & NICKELODEON MOVIES live-action feature film, THE LAST AIRBENDER, directed, written, and produced by M. Night Shyamalan, is set in a world where human civilization is divided into four nations: Air, Water, Earth, and Fire. NOW CASTING… MARTIAL ARTISTS, CRAFTSMAN, ARTISTS, DANCERS, GYMNASTS, FAMILIES, & GRANDPARENTS**

The part that I omitted from the original posting is this :Searching for… ASIAN-AMERICANS MEN & WOMEN, BOYS & GIRLS AGES 5-85 ...yes not CAUC-Asian..JUST ASIANS!!!!

Though being the determined and resourceful person that I am, I went anyways. Actually it was my friend "S", who is now SAG, that mentioned this to me. So I figured, "I got nothing better to do on a Sunday, why not!"

I headed out to Roosevelt avenue subway stop and I picked up the "7" train. It was a nice and pleasant trip. I got a seat on the train and it was not jam-packed with ASIANS, as it is on the weekday.

I got to Main Street in Flushing and I was in absolute shock. This area is literally Canal Street times a thousand!!! WOW! I have never seen SO many Asians and Asian stores than on Main Street. I think they may have more Chinese than in China! Well okay maybe not, but close!

Part of the intrigue to going to this casting call was this posting on the Internet of a protest being held there: last airbender casting call protest in flushing. The protest was because this "Avatar"/animated series consists of ONLY Asian characters. There is not one single white person in the series.

However, when Hollywood produces a movie, they are the big money shakers and in order to sell tickets, have to make it as marketable as possible. So in this case, they, "Hollywood People with 'deep pockets' to produce such a big budget film", decided to cast a female and male lead that are of "Caucasian persuasion", not ASIAN...

NOT going to make the ASIANS happy , considering the original animation was cast as all Asians and gave the Asians a brand name. Now this "brand name" is being tainted all for the 'almighty buck', so to speak. Mess with the Asian product, you mess with the Asians.

Mind you it turned out to be a very mild protest with a turnout of only two brave souls and die hard fans of the avatar to stand out there in the cold and hand out fliers. Still these two young individuals stood their ground and maintained their space and proved they had a purpose. This was of course until they got booted off the premises and had to go across to the gas station sidewalk to continue their brigade.

As for this cattle call, I guess it was funny in a way that My friend and I were the only Cauc-Asians in that room on the 2nd floor of the Flushing Town hall where we had to fill out the forms. For once I was the minority and not just another thirties blond "mom" type. When they called out "SAG" my friend was the only one out of about 100 Asians in the room that raised their hand. Still there is no way me or my friend will get cast on this movie.

We explained this to the casting person and they Though as sad as things have got, you have to try everything in terms of the economy and lack of film and TV productions, you have to try everything.

Desperate Times indeed...

Sigh :(

Cattle Call for two Feature Films

2009-03-01T14:32:00.000-08:00

I swore to myself that I would not waste my time going to one of these cattle calls. Last time I went to one of these, I had to stand outside for hours in a huge line of people just to fill out some forms and get a quick digital snap-shot taken.

So it was no surprise to head out into the city and see hundreds of people with headshots and resumes in their hands, shivering in the cold waiting to get inside to the doors of the church where they were holding the "auditions".

This cattle call was at least at a decent location over by W.59th St and 9th avenue at the church of Saint Peter the Apostle. it's definitely a huge area to hold a throng of people, though there were just TOO many people to bring in at once.

I recall being in this church before when I was on that movie "Don't Mess with the Zohan" starring Adam Sandler and ended up being a horrible experience. I knew that the location of the church sounded all too familiar and when I got to W 59th and started walking across Columbus Circle,the flashbacks of the horror became all too clear.

I will never forget the 3 days/nights on that shoot with NO food and No respect at all. Oh did I mention NO waivers for being out in the cold miserable rains...The list goes on, though I will stop here on that "Zohan Mess"! I really know how things work too well and how to work the system.

Why in the world I still don't have my SAG Waivers...Ask the "GOD of SAG Waivers" I wish I knew why I am still a non-union loser after all this time.

Moving on...So I got there and luckily I saw my friend "D" in line as soon as I crossed the street. Talk about luck b/c this meant I avoided having to wait in the line wrapping around the end of the block.

Eventually after standing outside for about a half of an hour, which wasn't too bad, we got inside to the church where there were rows of chairs for our next step to sit down and fill out a form which consisted of everything from your name to your bra size. Oh yeah don't forget color and make of your car, if you have one. Very Important information...

The two movies that they were "auditioning" for was an untitled "Nancy Meyers Project" and oh yeah...the movie that I auditioned for on a callback which I didn't get and would have meant a feature role and instant SAG..Named "The Sorcerers Apprentice" .

Yes, I auditioned for the role of a Russian Woman and was really close to getting it, though it didn't happen. Here is the original blog of my devastating failure and how I blew an opportunity of a life time:
http://annietalentsearch.blogspot.com/2009/01/call-backs-for-sorcerers-apprentice.html

So you can imagine how I felt even going to this cattle call. It's humiliating and embarrassing at this point. There I was offered a "Golden Opportunity" and it was stripped from me in an instant.

I'm sure the entire New York Actors Roster will be called for the one thousand people scene that they plan to shoot in April of this year. I'm sure I'll get a waiver for being in a crowd scene. Lord knows I was right beside Julia Roberts in "Duplicity" which is showing on Movie Trailers right now and I got NOTHING out of that.

Life is a long lesson in humility by --- J.M. Barrie --- I think I have humiliated myself enough
and need to move on..

Sigh ;(

Call backs for Sorcerer's Apprentice

2009-01-10T16:39:00.000-08:00

Finally made it to my callback for the Sorcerer's Apprentice, a Disney film. Spent the last two weeks up in Canada Land for the Christmas Holidays. Being around with family and Friends was great, though I could not stop thinking about this audition.

Perhpas I focused on it too much and this is why chaos ensued. It wasn't horrible, though not my all time best. I hope I get another call back to re-audition. The fact is when in this lifetime will I EVER get a golden opportunity like this one again?? The following describes that days events:

The call back was as expected where they wanted me to partner up with a Russian man and to see how that would look on camera. So from the very start in the waiting room, I come in with my Russian hat and start with "I'm Herer for ze callback, Yes!"

Seconds later, Julie the Woman who initially auditioned me came out and said Hi and introduced my partner to me. This man was probably union and very snobby. I tried to talk to him, but he was like dead wood. Normally you want to talk to your partner to get a feel for what they are like and it helps to connect in the audition process as we may end up working together.

I asked him who sent him here and he goes "St. Clair" agency. That was the extent of our communication outside in the waiting room. So I got ZERO vibes from him, and was called in shortly after to come into the room. The Woman Julie who initially auditioned me was there plus 5 other casting directors this time in the room.

I didn't get intimidated and went right into character with this dead wood of a man. We both get into the scene which is basically where the Russian man has this huge urn that he found at some flea market. So he is opening up this urn with a crowbar and the lid is really heavy so he is grunting and moaning. My part was to basically get angry and be the wife and nudge him on to what he is doing and what an idiot he is.

All of a sudden he gets the lid open and POOF a big black smoke and some evil spirit like a genie appears. The Russian Woman is taken aback in utter shock and races out and screams. This is what I did, only too assertively.

There was this huge backdrop they put in behind us as a green screen. So when I did the SHOCK thing, I ran out to the the corner wall, grabbed the backdrop curtain and down it came! It was SO embarrassing. Luckily they had a step ladder handy and immediately fixed it. I got one more shot at it as the director was explaining what he wanted from the character.That was it. Said Thank you and Good bye. No hints if I will hear a word from my agent, nothing.

This is worse than American Idol, b/c at least with Idol, the judges tell you right then and there if you suck and didn't get the part. Now it's this huge waiting stressful game of did I get it or not.

If I don't get called soon, then I guess it's gone, and then I will wonder what I did wrong for weeks. The only good thing is that by "breaking the curtain" at least they will remember me. Don't know if that is a good thing or bad thing. I have no idea. I wish I knew. So that's the latest. What I do know is that I worked so long and hard, doing this character all these years. If anyone deserves this role, it IS ME!

Now I'm even more stressed out with the unknown. Sigh ;(

If you believe it!

2008-12-16T17:51:00.000-08:00

The snow is falling outside in BIG white fluffy balls of fun and hope. Could it be, oh could it be. I just got a call-back from Stanley Kaplan agency that I, yes I got a callback!!! This was for an audition I did back on December 1st, 2008 for the feature film, "The Sorcerers Apprentice".

I recall being on the set of that ever miserable, CUPID, all the way out at Hellsgate studios by the Triboro Bridge. I was in holding area and contemplating whether I should cancel on the audition altogether. I have had SO many auditions which were a waste of time to go to. For instance, those "go-sees" where they see you for 2 seconds, take a picture and that's it. You waste an entire day just for that.

This was a little different as I snuck out of holding area, and luckily had a good friend on set to let me know what was going on. So I took the LONG trip from all the way from the edge of Queens to audition for this.

Normally I would not give a shit about these auditions, though this one was for a Russian Woman, and I knew I could do this part. Still I went and flew into this audition with real anticipation, especially when I saw the "Svetlana" Brighton Beach babe audition in front of me.

I though for sure she would get it as she was younger and prettier than me. Yet I went into that audition with all might and I know I did the best I could. After 2 weeks of getting devastating news, I really thought I was done in for and had no hope in hell, never mine hellsgate!

LO and behold, after almost giving up completely, I got a call today from Jasmine at the agency that I got a callback and the people at Disney WANT to see me!!!!!!

I am taken aback right now. A callback means nothing until you get the part. Still this is a HUGE breakthrough! I really HOPE I land this part. I fell it is meant for me.

Listening to a track on youtube.com for Chorus Line and the track is " I Hope I get it". They may have been dancers, though it is the same grueling struggle, trying to make it. Trying to get some rewards for all your efforts. I HOPE I get it!!

A.

FAILURE is thy name

2008-08-25T09:07:00.000-07:00

Posted on 08/25/2008 at 11:55 AM

The following entry is a reflection of how hard it is being in this business and how I am at the verge of giving up b/c of all my failed attempts at auditioning for parts that were clearly for me and I didn't get.

I am actually back in Canada now with my Mother, Canada Mom. Mind you I am already bored and can't wait to get back to New York. There is nothing to do here and your creativity gets crushed along with your spirit when you get reminded of being a failure.

I really dreaded this trip and now I really regret coming up here, even though it's for a short time. It's not that I expected to come back here as a Rockstar or someone famous, though I wish I had something to speak of and to show some success. It's embarrassing and humiliating when you see all your friends with kids and families and lives and all I can say is well I live in New York. Big Deal :(

I keep clinging on to hope, but failure I guess is a constant factor in my life. The thing is I really try to believe and read all those "Secret" books and still end up getting zero or worse off where I started.I am honestly not having a self-pity trip here. It's facts.

For instance I went to audition for TLC's "What Not to wear". When the producer initially called me for this I was excited and ready to be on the show. I auditioned outdoors in Times Square for this where they had this 360 degrees mirror set up. I was Clearly the worst dressed one there with purple socks and a wool hat on in the 90 degree Fahrenheit weather.

The producers asked me questions while I was in the booth and I know I nailed it. I was funny and sincere. Even the cameraman was laughing when I got out of the booth and said I did great. I was happy and finally thought that I found my niche to be the worst dressed background extra. Two weeks went by, no calls, e-mails nothing.

The next week I went to this audition to play a gypsy for a regional commercial. I just happen to have a gypsy costume and have played a "gypsy character" in the past with an authentic European accent. In fact I have done this character for years.

I get called in to audition and again I thought I nailed this. All the "gypsies" before me read one line and were sent out. I went in the room , read the script 3 times and was asked to stay and wait. After an hour waiting, the guy comes out of the door and says "Well call you!" Again No calls, no e-mails, nothing.

The best disappointment has to be the next go-see audition. They were seeking a blonde Canadian age ranging from 35-40! BINGO! Thought I hit the jackpot here! Let's see I'm blonde, btw 35 and 40, plus I'm Canadian. So I get to the auditions and they tell me I'm NOT Canadian enough!!!! I'm NOT kidding.

They said they wanted Canadian from British Columbia, because they speak British!!! After hearing that I was like these casting are idiots b/c in Vancouver , British Columbia, they DON"T speak British! Still not even to get that part.

You know you get to a point that you can only get beaten up so many times before you just can't take being defeated anymore. To top it all off, it has been really slow with background work, though the day I leave there are not one, but two Verizon commercials that pay $200.00 .

You get to a point as with doing Stand-up and you ask yourself "Is the abuse and disappointments really worth it?" I wonder.

CA :(

How to audition for a reality show!

2008-06-11T16:28:00.000-07:00

(from June 8,2008)

The other day I went to a really bogus audition. Figures it was from the Craig's List. It was for a reality show, actually to audition for a pilot for a reality show to be pitched to ABC networks. Here is the title of the show "The Party"! I'm not kidding.

Basically it is another reality show like Survivor where they "Cast" people off the island, only here it is at a party. I mean how many parties can you possibly have?? The best part was that the supposed casting director and his videographer were trying to push a course into our faces that they run.

The course in itself is a joke. It is a class that instructs you on "How to audition for a reality show!" It's like you have to be f'in kidding me! They were selling these courses for $100.00 and b/c we auditioned for them we can get it for the low price of $50.00! Yippee. I'm going to jump at that opportunity!

After having about 15 of us in a line in that audition room, the goes down the line and asks us "Why we would want to be cast for this show and what would make you the best candidate?”

Everyone answered as best as anyone could and replied that they are enthusiastic and like to party! The bald headed director then blasted us all saying that we all answered the question wrong!! Then again he started in with how we should take this course on "How to audition for a reality show!"

His partner and he go on how this course will change your life and if you join now you will be on the list for first pick on any upcoming reality shows! Unbelievable!!!

So this was a huge waste of my Sunday to go all the way into the city with this blasted heat. All this guy was interested in was selling his course and picking up the 5"9, 26 year old attractive model with rasinettes for breasts.

It is just such a huge disappointment to waste time on this bogus auditions like this. In the ad they “claimed” they were looking for average people from the age range from 18-60 years old! No Models or specific body types. Yet it all seems to go down to the Model of the group to be the eye candy and overall winner!

When the bald headed director came up to the model with raisinettese for breasts and asked her why she would be good for the show, she replied “Because I’m beautiful!”

The worst part is that the attractive young blond with not much to say will probably get the part. Of course I who have the talent, gets cast out even before I get a chance to get cast.

I give everything a fair chance and try out for so many things because you never know, though this farce of an audition makes Last Comic Standing auditions have merit!

Enough said. This heat is outrageous. Keep Cool.

CA;)

My audition for the GONG Show

2008-05-26T06:13:00.000-07:00

(from May 22, 2008)

I was still at home in Queens when my friend Rich called me up to tell me he was already at Arlene’s Grocery, and that no one was there except for an old Homeless man. This was where they were holding the auditions for The Gong show, originally broadcast n the 70’s, now to be hosted by Dave Attell.

I eventually got there on the “V” train for “virtually slow” and the doors of Arlene’s Grocery were open for the show. Clearly there were not too many people at the club which is known for late nights of extreme “punk Karaoke”, vomiting patrons, and exclusive debauchery and selective drug exchanges in the basement bathrooms.

I also anticipated that there would be a huge line-up and I that I would be waiting for at least 7 hours. Though when I got there, the production assistants were just setting up and getting their disclaimers and papers ready for people to come in.

Put it to you this way. I got to Arlene’s at 10:30 am and got seen at approximately 11:15 am. I was number 4 on the list! Ahead of me were three other performers, one of them was the guy who we thought was homeless and turned out to be the legendary “Bingo Gazingo. He is a legendary rap/scat NYC artist. He raps poetry, is 90’ years old, and has one tooth remaining that dangles when he grins!

Bingo gets up on the stage, barely mind you; he situated himself on the stage and then begins his rant. The producers and everyone start to applaud gesturing for him to get off stage, but instead he continues to ramble on and on. He is in his own world and the producers don’t know what to do!

Finally someone shouted “Next”! Bingo realizes that it is his time to get off the stage. He attempts to get off the stage, but can’t! The stage was SO high up the he was shaking and everyone thought he was going to collapse! In an instance, ten people scramble to the stage to try and lift the poor old man off the stage. What a sight! Then the producer asks: “Who came with him and brought him here”?? No one replied. Someone in the distance cries out, he came on his own! Next thing you know the audition was at a standstill until someone was found to escort Bingo home.

After that situation was under control, the audition resumed. My friend Rich went up. He held a large magnifying glass to his face and said “This is me in High-Def”! People laughed, next! Then we had a taste of a really weird dude who seemed normal in the holding are where he was wearing a suit and tie and looked like a business man.

His turn is up and all of a sudden he strips his shirt and tie off and puts on a white T-shirt with the words “DR.COOL” Emblazoned all over it which he must have just done as you could still get that “magic marker high” from a freshly indelible sharpie. He gets up on stage and just when you though it could not get any worse, he starts preaching and rapping about the anti-Christ, the second coming and stuff. It was a mess!

So when it was my turn to go up, the producers were already subjected to a train wreck and I was in an awkward position. I ended going up and doing an “ethnic song” while dressed in Gypsy garbs. Trust me. I was the most normal one there! That’s the scary part! I think I did alright considering I wasn’t taken out and asked to leave immediately!

Following me there was this amazing dance sexual group from Russia! I have seen this group perform before at Americas Got Talent, and they are truly amazing. The Lead dancer calls himself “Leo” is this exotic sexy Russian 7-foot tall sexy young man with glitter on his lips. Accompanying him are these 3 very sexy, erotic dancers.

As Leo towers over all these dancers, he starts the routine off with this huge coat embedded with flowers. They start dancing to that song “You could be my cowboy”, he starts getting into this sexual escapade, similar to Rocky of Rocky Horror Sweet transvestite. And he takes his huge flowered coat off to hum just wearing skin tone briefs. Meanwhile the ladies are swinging hoops and dancing around him.

Needless to say, this group stole the show. After they finished the Men were all astonished and the Women, including myself were drooling! Soon the media was there including NYPost.com, Insiders Edition and TMZ.com were there interviewing and taping the acts. They all gravitated towards the Russian dance erotic group and interviewed them thoroughly.

There was no way you could compete with this group. The only other act that really got the media’s attention was this guy who spun basketballs on his nose! Even the guy who came in a straight jacket and wrapped himself in heavy chains was no competition for the Russian group!
After I auditioned I stood around attempting to get some interviews.

I did manage to get interviewed by “Inside edition”, though briefly. Also the NY Post was there, I posed for some pictures, though I check out today’s’ NY Post and even though there was a blurb about the event, no one’s’ pictures were in there.

If you go to NYpost.com, (May 23, 2008 edition) online, you will see the Russians and the “globetrotter” in the video posted. Guess I didn’t make the cut.

Oh well, no regrets, it was a fun day and time. At least I didn’t get “GONGED”!!!!

CA

Americas Got Talent Auditions, Sunday April 6, 2008

2008-04-12T08:23:00.000-07:00

So I went to the America Got Talent auditions. Originally I was not going to go though my friend Susan the clown was adamant in going and asked me to go with her. So I thought I have nothing else going on today, why not.

We got in the line at Jacob Javitts Center around noon. It was cold outside and felt like early October with the Grey/dreary skies. Already there were thousands of people lined up and wrapped around the entire place.

The line started moving about an hour and a half after we got our spot. Finally the line started moving and just to bring us to another line downstairs by the parking lot and bus stops, still being outside.

Finally after another 3 hours, the PA came around and gave us our stickers and numbers to go with our forms. Eventually after another hour, we actually got inside where yet again another line in an "S" formation was formed.

This last line was for registration. So you would think you were good to go after that. Not the case. After you got registered, then you had to go through another security person and down the escalators to the "holding area" where over 1000 people were dwelling and waiting.

I saw a fellow background actor there and he said he was there since 10am and still didn't get seen until 6pm! So that being said, Susan and I found a spot to sit down and wait. Susan knew this Woman there, Vickie who she did some clown work within the past.

I plopped down on the ground and didn't even care how dirty the floor was as I was SO tired from standing all that time. Meanwhile Susan, who was in full clown gear, was entertaining young kids and making "balloon animals" for them.

There were groups of people strewn all over that room. They had tons of musicians. In fact I think the majority of entertainers were singer/songwriter acts. Other than that there were a few dance troops, magicians and child prodigies.

After waiting in the main room for several hours, out numbers were finally called. I thought I may have a slight chance as I was dressed up as a Gypsy, and I was prepared to do a musical comedy act which I thought would make me stand out. SO not the case.

Once the guy came on the bullhorn and read out the numbers we were called to wait in another line-up and they mixed singers with magicians and dancers. There was no designated judge for different talents.

When it was finally our turn to head out to the audition rooms, there were a group of chairs alongside the wall by a door where we would eventually audition. The chairs were set there for a reason as it would be over another hour wait. The P.A. We had was nice enough to tell us that if they like you, they will keep you in the room for over ten minutes. If they don't you’re done in seconds.

As were sitting there, the camera people came up to us and asked us if "We were nervous going into the audition"? I replied, "After waiting a thousand hours, I am SO numb, I have no nerves left!"

Finally my name gets called, and I go into the room. You walk into this huge room where there are only 3 people there. One is the camera man, one judge, and another P.A. They have the camera ready and ask you to stand on the black tape marked "X".

Behind you is a huge wallpaper of the "America's Got Talent" poster. The judge tells you to say your name and what act you are about to perform. I state my name and begin into song. I got zero reaction so immediately I went into another bit. Within seconds my fate was determined as I heard the big "NO"! The worst part really was the fact that this bitch of a judge yawned while I was performing.

While I was performing, I saw her yawn, and you try to ignore it but it does get to you and immediately I lost all confidence and basically sabotaged my act when I saw the yawn. So that was the end of that. I stormed out of the room, and then my friend Susan was called in to go next.

Though the judge that had just destroyed my confidence decided to take a bathroom break right after me and left Susan the clown waiting around for another half hour before she was actually called in to come into the room.

Finally Susan was called in, all decked out in her clown costume with props, baboons and gags. My friend Susan does "clowning" for a living, so she is pretty good at what she does. That didn't matter. Seconds later she came out of the door, really upset. The worst sight I ever seen is a clown cry. It really is sad.

So that was the end of it. Susan was really devastated as was I. At least I knew that I could go back to Astoria to the local pub and bitch and complain to people while having a few beers. Susan really was looking forward to this and her spirit was really crushed.

As we were leaving the building, several of the kids that she made balloon animals earlier on for, asked her how she did. These kids were upset for her. She brought so much joy to these kids, and she was not a happy clown at this point.

I was not a happy camper either. Though I should have known better not to go at all to an audition of this nature. In some ways it was worse than Last Comic Standing. At least this was not a overnight lineup and I only wasted 10 hours of my time as opposed to 20 hours! Still it's the same miserable game.

How can a P.A. or a segment producer determine my fate or if I have any talent?? This is just another show that is clearly looking for the "entertainment" value for ratings. It’s about “Cashing in”. Ka-Ching! Isn't that what it is always about?? The title of this show and many other reality shows should be Americas got Capitalism!

CA

My Audition for CBS’s MILLION Dollar Password

2008-03-16T08:46:00.000-07:00

I went to the million dollar password auditions this week. They held the auditions at the Kaufman Astoria studios, which was great for me because I live in Astoria and its walking distance for me. It was a nice day warm, high of 53F, spring-like day which made it a nice day for walking.

I got there and walked through the main entrance, signed in with security, got my visitors sticker pass and then sat down where there was already a group of 12 people sitting in the chairs and rehearsing, so to speak.

I'm sure some of you may know how this game works, but just in case you don't here it is...
Basically one person (the giver) has a word given to them. They absorb the word then start to give clues to their partner (the receiver) so they guess the word.

For example, let's say the word is "BLING". The "giver" would say Jewelry. The "receiver" would reply "necklace". Not the word. So the "giver" would give another clue, "Ghetto"....then suddenly it pops into the receivers mind and out he/she iterates "BLING"!!!!!!! Yes! You got the PASSWORD! Yeah whatever.

Back to the audition process..... we were told to be there by noon and of course with my experience doing any kind of auditions, they never start at the time mentioned. An hour and a half later, the Lady comes out and walks around to collect our paper work. Shortly after wards we all get called into another room.

This is where this young PA joins the Woman to explain this game and how it works. The guy is going down a huge list of things not to say for example you cannot use contractions, abbreviations, acronyms, initials, etc. So this basically leaves you with not much to work with.

After that being said and done, the PA breaks the room up into two teams to practice playing the game. Let me tell you that was difficult enough having one side of the room yelling out clues and the other side throwing out possible answers to guess the word. It was a mess.

A few rounds of that and everyone in the room were even more nervous about the game then before they even entered. Then the actual process of auditioning was happening as the Woman came around to take digital shots of all of us. Another girl knocks on the door, comes into the room and starts calling people to come in to the actual audition. The nerves were really kicking in now.

While I was sitting in that room, to my surprise, one of my fellow background friends, Juan, came into the room with such great news. Apparently he went in to audition at 11:00 am and just got out and said that the producer said he liked him and to practice and come back in April to re-audition! OK Great!!! I was thinking, maybe I do have a chance at this. There was my sign of hope.

Well that hope was soon shattered when it was my turn to audition. I was called to go in with this young kid by the name of Michael. He was probably barely 20 years old, also an actor and does stage. He was a very bright, handsome young kid. We got along great and introduced us to each other even before we go into the room.

In fact we practiced with words for about an hour before we auditioned. Since we were one of the last ones to go into the auditioning room, the PA even gave us more tips to help us out. SO you would think that we would have the advantage here. Not so much.

Michael and I enter the room. It is a very small room. In fact it was actually a laundry room. The washer and the dryer in the back was a dead giveaway. This "room" is probably used to do laundry to wash clothes that get dirty on other sets in the Kaufman Astoria Studios. Since they film Sesame Street at this studio, maybe they have used this room to wash "Oscar the grouch" when his mouth gets a little too dirty!

That was the basic set-up. A simple collapsible table, one producer, who was so young that he just barely got out of puberty, and a heavy set girl, who was friendly and just probably just got her masters degree in public relations. The producer kid told us what he was looking for and the girl set up the camera and asked us our names.

Individually we had to go in front of the camera, state our name, where we are from, and something unusual about us. Typical audition stuff as they want to get something unusual about ourselves because that equals ratings. I told them my name and age and said “I can breathe with my mouth open!” Quickly after that they get Michael and I to stand by each other and to do a "Speed Round" of the game. Fine, let's do it.

I start the game off as the "giver". The word that is given to me is "BUNNY". Simple right?? Not so much. I start giving the clue to the young man. I say "Rabbit", "Easter"...then I say "Bugs".......I really thought he would get it, instead he says "ANTS"!!!!! I am like NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! I can kind of get why he said Ants, and perhaps he was just too young to know that I meant Bugs Bunny???

The they "Switch" it around and he gives me the clues. So he starts out with "Liquid", I respond Water. Then he gives Chicken, so I say "SOUP"... Time is out. The password was "GRAVY?""" Exactly. Why did he not say Thanksgiving, Turkey, sauce, something like that?? Yup, so that was my audition. That was that. I really can’t blame Michael, he is young and there is a lot of pressure to audition for this.

I guess it wasn't a total waste because the girl told us that we both look "GREAT" on camera and she loves our energy. Yippee, does this mean I get the home version of the game??? I guess not. Oh and we can both come back and audition in April. Thanks but I think I will pass ;)

I tell you why this show is not going to work. For one thing, I'm not going to be on it! Seriously, I think this show barely lasted in the 70's and to bring it back is a mistake. The only staying power in a show like this is probably the fact that they have celebrities on it. Otherwise, it's really hard being under all that pressure to come up with a word in 2 seconds on the clock. The turn-over for a show like this is huge.

I was in the audience on the actual taping of the show this past Tuesday and nobody was even close to winning the million. The most money winnings anyone got was ten-thousand. That's nothing for a show like this.

Having Regis Philbin as a host also makes it more appealing to viewers, though this is no "Who wants to be a millionaire". That had to be one of the best game shows ever!

Oh well, so much for winning big, maybe I will get lucky and win at the raffle of giveaways they have for being in the audience. Better than nothing, I guess.
It just feels like another failed attempt to try and succeed at something.

SIGH! CA :(

Pics from the Peeps in LCS Line

2008-02-13T08:22:00.000-08:00

This morning after, I am putting all this into perspective. WASTE OF TIME! I'm feeling much better this morning and listening to Mozarts' Requiem.

This entire experience felt like one big “Olympic” funeral mass of defeat. Perhaps I didn’t expect to get GOLD, though a few of us should have at least got the BRONZE or SILVER.

After reading the blog posted by Russ, I am utterly even more disgusted by this entire process. I was so happy to see that Sandy did get the call back to come back and audition for the judges. Then later on they say “OH we’re Sorry!” “We had enough today and won’t be seeing you after all!”

Also the way they conducted this audition was absurd. What are we trained monkeys that can tell jokes on contact in 2 seconds. Or perhaps we should all be like Pavlov’s Dog and every time a bell rings, bark out a joke! Or perhaps we should just drool on command.

That actually may have worked considering they were just looking for spectacle to enhance their ratings.

Enough said. If I keep going this blog will be pages long. I think I have got my point across. Feel free to leave any comments or suggestions.

Below is the link to photo bucket where I have uploaded pictures taken throughout the night: (copy and paste link into your browser)

http://s212.photobucket.com/albums/cc165/Canada_Anne/Last%20Comic%20Standing%202008/?albumview=slideshow

CA=(

Talent search

2008-01-14T15:25:00.000-08:00

Hi!

I am submitting for this talent search as I know the description fits me perfectly. I have been singing since I could walk. When I was young, my Father put me into the choir and music classes. As he was a musician he had great expectations for me to make it big.

Well fate stepped in and a horrific truck accident occurred and killed my Father. He was on life support for less then a week and I remember being by this bedside just before his last breath and his last dying wish was for me to pursue music and singing.

Losing him at such a young age devastated me and crushed my spirit for many years to come. Though I continued to sing in church choirs and began writing my own songs as well. In fact I was on a mission to make my Father's dreams come true to be a great performer.

I spent many years singing karaoke and with live bands. Singing has always made me feel alive. I always felt like I was born to sing and entertain. Whenever I would sing, people would come up to me and tell me how great I am and how I should pursue my singing abilities beyond the local karaoke bar.

Years later, I made the decision, packed my bags and moved
to New York City.

It was a pretty scary move as I did not know anyone and was never in a city like this one. Though with my undying spirit, and determination, I pursued my path and have had minor successes since. Though my ultimate dream of achieving national recognition for my talents has failed me.

I have tried other avenues in the entertainment world and came upon doing stand up comedy. I have had minimal success in this field though I did get on NBC's Last comic standing back in 2006. Even with the comedy, I have incorporated my singing and created song parodies as a result.

Before I did the Stand-up comedy, I sang with live bands at open music jams. One that I went to in particular was in the West village . The keyboardist liked my singing so much that he wanted me to become the lead singer of their band. I started rehearsing with him and recording some songs to play out live in NYC venues.

The keyboardist and I fell in Love and got married.

This is when everything fell apart. I moved in with him and he became extremely abusive both physically and emotionally to me. It got so bad one day, that I was forced to call up the Police!

He was put in prison for a short time, and I was left alone with unfinished songs and no hope left. I went to therapy for a couple of years. It took me a while to get back into the music.

Despite this horrible experience, I knew I had to continue and prevail. It was the only way to heal. I took it upon myself to learn how to play the guitar and started to go to open music venues on my own again.

This man who saw me perform one night, approached me after I performed and told me how great I was and how he could help me out. Considering the bad luck that I had in the past, I did take caution with this man. Though I did began to trust this man and did eventually fall in love with him.

He was a musician as well. He played guitar and told me how he had a big hit in the 70's and how he had a manager and could help me. He did manage to help me rearrange one of my songs musically and add a really nice bridge to it. We would go to the studios in Lower Manhattan and practice this song of mine that I had buried for so long. He helped me revive it and brought much hope and restored confidence in me.

I really thought this was it. Finally I can get someone to open a door for me. One day I got a phone call from this Woman. She was freaking out and telling me off. I was telling her to "Calm down"! She continued that she was not only this man's manager, but also his wife!

That really shook me up and crushed me.

Especially after the fact that I invested SO much time and believed in this man with all of my heart, when all along he was just using me. The worst part of this was that the song we practiced was really sounding great and was ready for the studio. Well that never happened.

So this is where I am at now. I have the talent and the ambition though I just seem to be thrown obstacles every time. Music has always been my passion. I believe it's my savior and a deep part of my soul. When I sing I really feel the songs that I sing. I feel alive.

"If you don't live your dream, you die"! I really feel like a big part of me has died as a result. This is why I am submitting. For myself, and for my Father. For a dream that I have desired for long and have never had the chance to make true. For America is the land of dreams come true, and I really hope you will give me the chance to make mine come true once and for all.

Sincerely,

Annie

(646)708-1535
Canadaanne@gmail.com